Holy Shit it’s Only Tuesday…

Well, let’s make the best of it. As you go out to the big bad world on your way to work, or school, or the unemployment office, or the empty lot where you bury your victims, whatever, let me tell you a little something my grandpa used to tell me.

He would say, “Sonny… Stop picking your nose and listen cause I’m only gonna say this once and you better damn well pay attention. I have lived a long life and have seen many many thing and if there is one thing I have learned in my experiences, is that your grandmother is a lot stronger than she seems…. No… that’s not it… This is what I really learned…When you’re out in the wilderness, just you and nature and whatever miserable soul is foolish enough to be hanging out with you, the most important thing you can remember, if you forget everything else, is to make sure to piss down the river from where you’re gonna get your drinking water.”

Grandpa liked beer…

Anyway, let us apply this bit of drunken outdoor wisdom to our daily lives in the following way. If your gonna piss someone off, make sure they’re standing downhill from you. It’s just common sense, really.

Have a nice day!

Originally Published 09/01/2009